It just had to be this way
by Lady Maria
Summary: Crossover with HP. TTH secret santa for Luna; what happens when love goes horribly wrong? Spike pairing


_Title: It just has to be this way_

_Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, or the song It just has to be this way. J.K. Rowling, Joss and Reba McEntire own them respectively._

_Fandom: Harry Potter/ Buffy the Vampire Slayer_

_Rating: PG-13 to PG-15 _

_Pairing: Spike/ Draco; mentions of Dawn/Oz and Anya/Xander _

_Spoilers: Small OOTP, small for everything before the last episode of season 7. The last episode went a bit differently here; it was Buffy and Faith who sacrificed themselves to close the Hellmouth and Andrew died instead of Anya._

_This is Luna's Secret Santa fic; these were her requirements: Pairing Requested: Spike/Draco (first choice), Spike/Hermione, _

_Willow/Draco,_

_Willow/Ron_

_Type Requested: Romance/Angst (usually hand-in-hand)_

_Maximum Rating Requested: R_

_Well, I'd never written HP/BtVS before and I couldn't really see any of those pairings together. Well, I could see the Willow ones but I don't write Willow. I -can't- write her and she gets so much fic time already._

_So I plunged head first into a Spike/Draco. I hope you like it._

_Merry Christmas, Luna._

**The sound of your voice, the touch of your skin**

"Don't go." He didn't want to beg; Malfoys never begged.  But there was just something about his lover…

"You aren't like the bloody bint," Spike's hard gaze drifted over the platinum blonde. "I'll be back, mate.  Before sunrise; I can promise that."

"I'll see you then," the Malfoy heir muttered, sinking back into a deep sleep.  He had the day off work because he'd been out all night.  When he did get back from the Resistance raid, Spike had been waiting.

Sometimes he hated the Resistance and sometimes he loved his work.  In his sixth year, seven years before, Dumbledore had formed a select group of students.  They were called the Light Resistance and their main purpose was to fight the Deatheaters. Even now he wondered why the Headmaster had chosen him; he'd still been Dark back then.

The original members had been Hermione Granger, Harry Potter, Cho Chang, Luna Lovegood, and himself.  They had been called the Bloody Five, and were still feared. 

Ironically, Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived, was the 'darkest' of them.  He would kill on the spot and not feel a bit of remorse.  Draco knew that killing Deatheaters was Harry's way of getting revenge for Sirius's death.  In nearly eight and half years, his colleague-turned-friend had never forgiven himself.  But Harry also knew that it was Voldemort's fault. In the end, that was what brought about the finale of Voldemort's second reign.

Hermione would torture the ones she captured, playing with them for hours before killing them. She was fair and would bring in the Deatheaters' children, but she would kill the Deatheaters and their wives. Her reason was that, "They do it to Muggles and Muggle-borns.  Why shouldn't a 'mudblood' do it to them?"  Aurors hated the young witch, nicknamed the Inquisitor after the Spanish of the fifteenth and sixteenth centuries.  She had too much rage for the coldly practical Aurors, too much passion for her job.

Cho was simply fueled by revenge for Cedric. When Voldemort fell, they knew that it would only be a matter of time before she left.  While his followers were still out there, she'd only stayed for the one who'd killed her childhood sweetheart.

Luna was the one that would never be affected by Imperious.  They thought that since she was slightly odd already, Imperious didn't hurt her. It was a good thing back in the early days when she was still getting the lightning quick reflexes that she was known for.  She fought in the name of the Abdominal Snowman, but other than that, she was alright.  She was kooky, but an important member of the team. 

 And he himself…well, at first he'd done it because he'd been ordered. As time passed, however, he had fought for the victims that didn't have a voice. The children who'd never grow up; the parents-to-be who would never achieve parent status; he even fought for the Deatheaters who had been given to this life by their parents. He would have been one of them if Dumbledore hadn't saved him when he did.

There were more members now, even though Voldemort was gone forever.  There were still Deatheaters on the loose, and Dark wizards would never fade away.  The times had truly changed, and he had to say that they were changing for the better.  With nearly fifty members, the Resistance was still out there fighting, and four of the Bloody Five were still involved. Cho had left three years before to have a family.  She said that she just wanted to leave it all behind.

Burrowing deeper into the covers, Draco really couldn't fault her. He often wanted to leave it all behind as well.  But then he would think of another child having to grow up without parents and his blood would boil.  He always made certain to let his blood boil before they went on missions.

It just made him fight better.

**If we go there it will start all over again**

"No, Red. I won't come back." Spike stared through the fire at the Wiccan. Sometimes firetalking could be a pain but other times it was just really odd. Like now, since Willow's hair was the same color as the flames.  Thus, it looked like she had no hair. "Not even for Xander and Anya's second wedding."

"And hopefully," the witch added, "they'll actually make it to saying 'I do' this time."

"Yeah." He paused. "You understand why, don't you?"

"You can't come back because Buffy was your ex and your new lover doesn't like remembering that you had a past. In a nutshell, you don't want to make Draco jealous." Willow smiled sadly at the vampire.  At first she hadn't been able to forget that he'd tried to kill her, but now he was one of her friends.

"I knew that you'd understand."

"I do," she sighed. "Call me if anything changes, okay?"

"Will do."

"I'll hold you to that promise, Spike."

"I know you will." 

**So don't even call, there's no need for checking in**

"Harry," the blonde nodded at the almost asleep-on-his-feet man.

"I'm awake, I'm awake!" Harry shouted. "Oh, hi Spike.  You here to talk to Dumbledore?"

"Here to talk to the Bloody Four," he corrected.

"Why?"

"He says that, for a while, I'm to stop working solo on Resistance projects."

"Don't you hate Dumbledore?" Harry cracked a wry smile at the vampire.

"Yes!" He growled the word out, nearly going 'grrr' at the same time.

"Calm down, mate. It's no reason to cause a fuss.  We all know about your 'relationship' and none of us have a problem with it. However, I will tell you what we told Cho and Terry years ago. 'Don't have sex where we can see or hear you.  Use a silencing charm if you must.'"

"Got it, mate."  Walking into the sunlight, as he tried to as much as was possible, Spike grinned. He loved the feel of the sun now that it couldn't hurt him.  Dumbledore had been good for one thing at least. He'd cast a charm to block the sun's harmful effects when the vampire had started three years before, after the defeat of the First.

Watching the vampire, Harry smiled sadly. He knew what it was to leave behind the past. "Do you miss your old life?"

"No. It's over, completely over. And at least the Nibblet isn't watching my every move anymore and Red isn't around to keep botching her spells and the Slayer doesn't threaten me constantly."

"In other words, you miss them terribly."

"That's about it, mate."

"Guess we should get going shouldn't we?" Harry shook off his melancholy which prompted Spike to do the same. "We should probably work out the details of the raid."

"Nothing worse than going in cold turkey," he agreed.

**If it's over, let it just be over**

**No, we won't be sharing coffee**

**Or having lunch from time to time**

"Does anyone have any suggestions?" Spike sighed. "We can't keep at this standstill forever. We need a plan."

"You want us to come up with a plan as we drink butterbeer and firewhisky?" Once upon a time, Hermione would have been completely astounded to hear her words. However, the years had changed her from that anal bookworm who had nagged her friends to get things done months in advance.  Now she was surprised when someone interrupted her precious time in Hogsmeade. 

"Inquisitor, please concentrate." Spike groaned. How had these become the cream of the crop, the best of the best?  "We're going in tomorrow night and we need a plan."

"You sound like Coho," Luna commented idly.  She was reading the Quibbler, looking for odd occurrences that she didn't already know about.

"Who's Coho?" Spike asked cautiously. Luna could be nearly as insane as Dru had been.

"We think that that's her name for Cho," Draco shrugged, "but with her, no one really knows."

"Now I remember why I always feel at home around all of you."

"Why do you?" his lover asked, pressing against him.

"All of you are bloody bonkers!" Spike smirked. "And the Scoobies aren't exactly the sanest of the crop."

"Hey, we resemble that remark!" Harry shook his head before he launched into the plan of what they would need to do on the raid. 

Even thought they all put up token resistance, each fell into the planning. *All in all,* Spike thought, *it looks much like a Scooby research party.*

**I won't ask about your family**

**Please don't ask about mine**

**This is never what I wanted**

Draco had collapsed into bed already, and Luna and Hermione had quickly followed. Now it was just Harry and Spike left in the living room of 12 Grimmauld Place. Mrs. Black's picture had been dismantled long before, and the Order had started meeting else where when the Resistance moved in. 

"Are you sorry that we used the killing curse?" Harry finally spoke up.

"Not really.  Slutty told me once that no matter what the Council told her, she would have killed humans if they'd done wrong by her town."

"What is she like?"

"She's mean, ornery, and stubborn as hell. She was loyal to her family and friends." He leaned back into his chair. "God, I miss her."

"Do you love her?"

"In a variety of ways, mate."

"What do you mean?"

"She was like my sister, my enemy, my lover." Spike shook his head. "First time we met, I tried to kill her. Next time we had an encounter, it was her turn. After nearly five years, we ended up in bed. She made me feel things I hadn't since Angelus. And she hated me more with every time we tumbled."

"Why?" Harry was perplexed. "Why would you have loved her if she didn't love you back?"

"She did in her own fashion but she didn't like it. It was the way she'd grown up.  She was fifteen when they told her that she'd be lucky to see eighteen and only sixteen when the damn bastards gave her two weeks notice."

"Notice for losing her job?"

"Notice for her death," Spike corrected. "We grew closer as the years went by, bound by our love for violence. Buffy always tried to stifle it, but the urge was there."

"She sounds like she'd make a great member of the Resistance."

"She would have.  But she died saving the world. Third time she'd died."

"I'm sorry, Spike. The way you talk about her, I always got the impression that she was alive."

"It's the way she wanted to go. Would have been a disgrace for her to go otherwise. What's your story?"

"I fight for my godfather.  Snape didn't prepare me during my fifth year the way he was supposed to and Sirius paid the price.  He died because I wasn't equipped to fight Voldemort. Ron didn't understand my guilt but Hermione did." Harry shook his head, trying to hide the tears. "Ron and I haven't spoken since the beginning of sixth year. Ron and Hermione haven't talked in nearly as long."

"Do you know what he's up to now?"

"He's an Auror. He's one of the ones who hate us."

Spike made a hard grating sound that Harry was hard pressed to recognize as bitter laughter. "Why do we fight, mate? Why do we continue risking ourselves for a bunch of prats who don't give a damn?"

"Because we thrive on the violence, Spike. That's the answer in a sodding nutshell."

"You would make such a cold vampire."

"Don't even think about it."

**And it's killing me to say**

**It just has to be this way**

**We gave all we could, we fought the good fight**

"Dumbledore, don't do this to us anymore."

"Now Draco," the headmaster of Hogwarts and leader of the Resistance twinkled, "lemon drop?"

"I mean it!" Draco shouted. "We've both fought for so long. Just let us leave!"

"Draco, you are two of my best operatives. With Harry, Hermione, and Luna added, you're unstoppable.  I won't lose your service."

"I don't care what you think!" Draco stood to leave. "We're done with the good fight. We're done with the uncertainty. We're done with the Light Resistance. Goodbye, Dumbledore."

Dumbledore had lost his twinkle as he too stood up. "I'm sorry my dear boy, that it has to end this way. _Imperious!"_

Draco, caught of guard by his leader turning on him, wasn't prepared. He only knew that whatever it was that Dumbledore would command him to do, he wouldn't like it. 

He was right.

**But no matter how we loved, we just couldn't get it right**

**It hurts to let go, but it's harder hangin' on**

**I don't want it to be over, we know that it's over**

"Look," Draco told his lover firmly, "I want to stay in the Resistance."

"That's not what you said earlier, love."

"Don't call me love!" Draco shouted. As he continued, he didn't see Spike recoil—it was the first time Draco had ever objected to his nickname. "Besides, it's not earlier is it? It's now and now I can't understand how anyone could want to leave the Resistance."

There was a look in Draco's eyes as he said it that had Spike worried. He knew that Dumbledore wasn't as pure as many thought. He also knew what type of means the wily old man would resort to.  After all, he'd been there as Tom Riddle grew darker under the mentorship of Albus Dumbledore, Charms Professor. 

Back then, Tom was destined for an important destiny with the Light side.  He and Dru had visited Hogsmead to wait for a chance to kill him and destroy a powerful force before he even became such a force. But by the time they had a chance, that pure soul was completely destroyed by dark magiks. That should have made them happy, but it didn't. Instead, they'd sworn revenge on Dumbledore.  Now the bastard had turned the tables again on Spike.

He drew in a sharp breath when Draco continued talking. To hell with Dumbledore; he was going to have to get out of here while the getting was good.

Two hours later, after Draco had gone home to sleep, he dashed out a quick letter and sent it on its way. Hopefully, she'd understand that something was wrong.

**No, we won't be sharing coffee**

**Or having lunch from time to time**

**I won't ask about your family**

Dear Nibblet,

I hear that you went and got yourself pregnant. What the bloody hell were you thinking?  Didn't your sister teach you anything? Besides, I know I taught you better than that.  Weren't you on birth control?  Or did you forget everything we all taught you, sod it all!

I swear that I'm going to kill that bloody wanker. What right did that soddin' git of a werewolf have to boink you? You are only a child! Well, you're twenty-one now, but you're still my lil'bit. And that damn musician hurt Red once upon a time too.  I'd be doing the world a favor if I killed him. Really.

I know. You don't want me to kill him, and you may still stake me if I try. Can I at least inflict permanent damage?  You're still frowning, aren't you? Can't blame a vamp for trying, though, can you? 

Take care, Nibblet.

Spike

Dawn grinned as she read the letter again, only to have the grin disappear.  She had missed the fact that there were no allusions to him having sex the first time through. That in itself was odd for one of her surrogate big brother's letters. And there were no mentions of Draco.  Not a single one.

Something had happened that she knew she wouldn't like.  Something bad, something that had a huge possibility of badly hurting her big brother.

A fierce looked of determination settled on her features as she gave Apocalypse a treat.  After sending the midnight black barn owl on his way, she settled down to write.

**Please don't ask about mine**

Dear Spike,

Okay, blondie, what's up? Every letter I've gotten from you for over two years has included details about Draco. I've also learned more about your sex life than I ever wanted to know. While the concept of my sister and my fav vamp having sex used to wig me out, you and Draco can wig me even more. I mean, honestly.

However, the fact still remains that you guys seem made for each other.  Okay, so I've never met him but that's your fault.  Not coming back to L.A. or even America. I know your lover can get jealous but that's still a bit much.

Onto another lover, you can't kill Oz. I'm planning on doing that when I'm in labor. They can't nail a woman who can plead excruciating pain. Sides, Wills and Buffy have already volunteered to help me hide the body.

He was drunk when it happened, and so was I.  Maybe that's suitable defense? I know. It so isn't.

Owl me back. I want the dish.

Dawn

Spike frowned as he read the letter. His Nibblet was far too perceptive. Sighing to himself, he grabbed the floo powder.  He called out Dawn's name as he stepped into the green flames.

**This is never what I wanted**

**And it's killing me to say**

"Spike!" the brunette twenty-one year old exclaimed as he appeared from the fire. Over the past three years, they'd gotten used to floo and apparating.  Granted, they'd been rather concerned when he'd told him that he was a wizard, but that had been a long time ago.

"Hey, Bit."  His greeting was too subdued, telling her far too much about what was going on.

"Sit," she ordered, pointing to the couch. "Good vampy. Vampy want a bag of blood?"

"Don't treat me like a pet dog."

"Will it get me the details any faster?"

"No."

"Okay," she shrugged, "then I won't treat you like a dog. Now spill."

"What, no please?"

"Fine," Dawn sighed. "Please spill all the gory details?"

"Much better, pet."  Spike took a sharp breath of unneeded air. Staring at the last picture of the Scoobies together, he told her. "Draco made me choose."

"Choose?" she echoed.

"Choose," he confirmed. "He told me to choose between Peaches and the rest of the Fang Gang, you and the other Scoobies, and all the other friends and memories I have."

"What was the other choice?" She dreaded the answer.

"If I didn't let him perform oblivate, then I had to leave him."

"Son of a cock sucking male whore!" Dawn had learned how to turn the air blue from Spike, but it was something she rarely indulged in.

"Language!" he reprimanded. 

"I'm all grown up now, and I can call him whatever I damn well please! Besides, who taught me how to swear?"

"You sound like Slutty."

"Don't call her Slutty," she corrected out of habit. "And I was made out of her, nimrod."

"You still sound like her!"

"Are we going to act younger than my unborn child all day, or are we going to work on living arrangements?"

"Living arrangements?" Spike echoed dully.

"Do you really want to go back there? Face everyone with the knowledge that they supported Draco's ultimatum?"

"You've gotten too smart for your own good." He sank down on the couch beside her. "I didn't even tell you that."

"What can I say," she shrugged, "I'm just the observer of the Scoobies and the new Slayers, the Scrappies."

"Do you have fixations on cartoon gangs?"

"Quite possibly."

**It just has to be this way**

**And even if I change my mind**

**Don't let me hurt me one more time**

"Come on, Spike!" Anya tugged at the vampire. "You wouldn't let me mope over Xander, so I won't let you mope over that Deatheater-wannabe!"

"'m not moping, Demon-girl." He resolutely stared into the fireplace, wondering if fire would be an easy way to go.

"You're coming to my capitalism party and that's final!" She continued yanking on his arm. For two people who had nearly died in the final battle, they were remarkably fit. That wasn't to say that the final battle hadn't been costly, but they'd walked away intact. 

Noticing the look on her face, he sighed. "Bloody soul makes me go all soft. What are you thinking about?"

"Remembering Buffy, Andrew, and Faith," she sighed. "The battle was forever ago, and I wonder sometimes if we'll ever move on."

"It'll come to pass, luv. Now do want to explain why you're inviting a male to your bachelorette party?"

"I had one of those the fist time. This time we're celebrating the wonderful world of capitalism and everyone is invited."

"I'd forgotten what a life felt like." Spike grinned before asking, "So will there be strippers there?"

"Spike!"

"I was just asking, pet."

**Stay away from me, be as cold as you can be **

**No, we won't be sharing coffee**

"You didn't tell her everything, did you?" Willow's quiet question caused the vampire to jerk.  He was seated at a back table at the capitalism party, away from everyone else and as far as she could tell, brooding.

"I didn't hear you, Red."

"A testament to how involved in your thoughts you were," she commented dryly.

"You callin' me conceited?" He raised an eyebrow at her, trying to look offended.

"You're not conceited right now," Willow grinned. "Tell me everything you didn't tell Dawn."

"The entire supernatural world will know by midnight!" Spike yelped.

"Your point is?"

"You can have a big mouth, so I'm not telling you."

"Yes, you are. We want to know everything so that we can extract revenge on that asshole."

"Willow, can it be you who influences Dawn's language so badly?" Spike asked in a high pitch nasal voice.

"No, you have the dubious honor in both our cases. Now buddy, you better spill before I make with the mojo." The witch froze at the look in Spike's eyes.

"Did you know that Dumbledore is pure evil?" he asked brokenly. "I watched what would have been one of the greatest forces of good become one of the greatest forces of evil because of him.  And I realized with horror that Draco had fallen under his spell as well. The others on the team hadn't; I can only think that Draco was put under Imperious when he went to try and leave the Resistance.  When he came back to the room we shared at the headquarters, he told me that he didn't want to get out after all. And then he made me choose."

Willow's eyes had been growing darker and darker as Spike talked. Now she started to hiss curse words. "That's it. Spike, we're going to do something about it."

"Red, no.  I can't go back to Draco now. He hurt me too badly."

"Fine, I'll wait for another time but here will be revenge."

 "That's good...you planned this, you little cunt."

"So?"

"I taught you and Dawn to well while Buffy was gone."

"Truer words were never spoken."

**Or having lunch from time to time**

**I won't ask about your family**

**Please don't ask about mine**

"Push, Dawn."

"You push, you bastard! Why couldn't that two-timing drug dealing whore of a werewolf who isn't even a good musician have shown up? Then I could kill the prick. He did this to me!"

Helplessly, Spike looked at the midwife. He wasn't exactly used to screaming women in labor.

"It's normal, dear, for the woman to do such things.  Although the curses have to be among the most inventive I've ever heard in any language." Gallia Scott was a witch that they'd met after Sunnydale had collapsed into the ground and they'd all retreated to Cleveland.

"That would be my fault." Spike smirked at Dawn only to feel the fingers in his hand shattering. "Bloody hell, Platelet, when is the damn thing going to be born? I don't think that my body can take much more of this."

"You're dead," she ground out, "so get over it!"

"I'm not even going to ask myself why I agreed to be here during delivery and stick around to baby-sit and patrol the damn Hellmouth."

Gallia just chuckled as she told Dawn to push once more.

**This is never what I wanted**

**And it's killing me to say**

**It just has to be this way**

**Oh, it just has to be this way.**

He lurked in the back of the church.  How could Draco have gotten married?  How could his Dragon have gotten married to _her_?  After all the time that they'd been together, Draco had gotten married rather quickly.

Dawn had released him from his babysitting duties for day.  For not even being a year old, Jenny Joyce was an extremely fast little bit. And he would have brought her but that would have caused problems that he didn't want.

Nearly crying blood tears, he watched as his former lover was bound to another.  He wondered what the children would be like.

Would they have the same slightly crazed look as Luna?  Or would they have Draco's superior attitude?  Would they ever know of their father's old lover?

He knew the answer to that. They never would because it had to be this way.

He left before he tried to kill Luna Malfoy. He didn't look back, and he never saw the expression of true horror and regret pass across Draco's face.

He never heard Draco's calls for him to wait. And the bleached blonde vampire never found out that Willow had rallied the witches of the English coven she'd stayed with that summer and together with Ripper, they'd all removed the Imperious from Draco while wreaking mayhem on Dumbledore. Ripper had been the one to kill him, though.

In some ways, it was fitting. Draco had been the one to tell him when he chose that, "It just has to be this way."

What goes around comes around.

A/N: Please review.


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